MARRIAGE AND FAMILY THERAPISTS OF NEW YORK
Welcome to MFT NY's
It is hard to believe the year is almost over. Generally, this time of year can be a time of reflection and introspection. At MFTNY we are very pleased with what is occurring. Our Anger Management groups are very active and the feedback is excellent! We will begin another teen group with the New Year. The Women’s Group will also start in the beginning of the year. We have had a wonderful response to our Anger Management Training Program and will be hiring a new therapist to assist with this
endeavor. Our Ulster County Projects are off to a good start and we are
planning to expand our services in that area as well. If you would like to
be notified of our upcoming groups, please email jatwood@optonline.net
The Holiday Blues
The holidays are upon us. They are a time of excitement, hustle and bustle. The are a time of festivities, partying with relatives and friends, and sharing gifts. They are also a time when people can get stressed, overwhelmed, sad and/or depressed. It is common to feel sad during the holidays. It is important to use common sense during this time to alleviate the stress and sadness. The reasons for feeling sad are many, ranging from being exhausted from all the increased holiday activity to financial situations.
Unrealistic expectations can play a major role in feeling sad. People often remember when they were young and how happy the holidays were. Some even glorify these early holiday celebrations. They may remember the “old” days as simply perfect. Then they may try to reproduce the old days. This can lead to unrealistic expectations—and to holiday blues.
The holiday time is often associated with family and togetherness. Memories of deceased family members can cause sadness. With the divorce rate at 57%, there could be additional stress of family visitations and strained family dynamics. Stress is common at this time as family members are forced to share their time with their children.
What You Can Do
Setting realistic goals
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Around the holidays can help. Do not expect yourself to get all shopping, wrapping, decorating and cooking done in a perfect way. Be honest with yourself as to what you can realistically accomplish. AND allow for mishaps, mistakes, or imperfections. Give yourself a break. You don’t have to be super Mom or super Dad.
Don’t overspend.
Know what your spending limit is and stick to it! Make presents instead of buying them. Paint a Christmas tree ornament, bake a cranberry bread, bring a small box of cookies. Start a new tradition by not purchasing presents but by making them.
Delegate.
Don’t try to do everything yourself. Asking people to help or bring a special dish helps them to feel more involved.
Take care of yourself.
Pace yourself, get plenty of rest, eat properly, Don’t let the pressures of shopping and coordinating wear you down. Give yourself alone time. While going to parties can be a fun experience, it can also be very taxing. Give yourself a rest period. Relax, take a bubble bath, recharge and rejuvenate.
Create family traditions.
These do not have to be elaborate. Videotape each year’s celebrations and watch the prior year’s celebration each year. Bring presents to a nursing home. One of the best antidotes to sadness is doing something for someone else.
Dwell on what you have
Rather than on what you don’t have. Spend time with people you care about and who care about you.
Coming soon
Online Certification in Management For Professionals
Are you a busy Professional who is interested in learning more about Anger Management?
MFT NY offers an Anger Management Training and Certification Program for Mental Health Professionals, School Personnel, and Law Enforcement Persons. This course is appropriate for marriage and family therapists, social workers, mental health counselors, psychologists, teachers, school administrators, as well as law enforcement personnel (probation officers, corrections, and parole persons).
Couples Getaway Weekend Workshops
Do you want to re-romanticize your relationship?
We are in the initial stages of developing getaway weekends for couples who want to enhance their relationship. This will involve morning and afternoon sessions in a beautiful and romantic environment.
Certificates of Completion are provided at the end of the program.
Contact us to keep updated on these new developing services.
What You Can Do...Con't
Do not eat or drink too much
Increased drinking will only intensify any sad feelings you have. Do not over indulge with food, especially those high in sugar and fat. Exercise regularly during this time period.
Get help
if you need it. If these feelings of sadness are too difficult to shake, get help. Don’t try to be macho or macha.
Express your feelings
to those around you in a constructive, honest, and open way. Begin your sentences with "I feel."
For for more such discussions join our men and women's groups to reserve a seat, e-mail jatwood@optonline.net or call 516-764-2526.
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